More deaths, it is the natural step in life

Today, is July 17, 2011 and incredibly in less than eight hours two of our best offices for CBP have left this earth for the same cause - CANCER - ! It is sad to see two good people move on to their final destination. This weekend has been very traumatizing to me, it has brought back memories of when my sisters died, when Lupe died two young people that couldn't help being sick...but such is life and we must move forward with the pain of losing loved ones. Why are kind and compassionate people dying? And the unkind and un-compassionate are not? Evil must die...but it doesn't. In a perfect world, maybe, but it is not a perfect world and in order to appreciate we must suffer to appreciate and learn to live in peace with the reality of the world. Appreciate the people that surround you and the most important people that bring you laugh, love, kindness, and compassionate so that when they are gone you can live with the memory of the good times for eternity.

The Final Goodbye

The background seems like a a peaceful place...I hope, wish and pray that this is where she is, that beyond death exist and that she is happy for eternity. I have faith and dreamt that this is where her home is and it will be mine for eternity when I am done on earth...definitely where we all need to go. Once the completion of our lives on earth is done and God is ready to send us to the beyond.

This is my second sister that died and one always thinks you are prepared for death, but not so when the loved one is so young and is a mother of two.

03/13/1967 to 06/06/1996 + eternal life!

This is a picture of my sister who at the tender age of 29 years old died June 6, 1996

If anyone has had a loved one die then you know what is like to go through the grieving process, it is not easy, yet it is necessary for our growth during our lifetime and beyond death. As I have lost four very precious people in my life, I have learned to move on from the pain and the desire to be with lost loved ones and ask them why it was that they died. Why was it that I didn't have any idea that they were dying? Did they know that they were dying? Did they feel pain? Did they know ahead of time? Did they see the light? There are so many questions to ask and none that can be answered until one dies, but can't come back and give a detail of account of the transporting of your soul from earth to beyond.

And though it is sad and painful for the loved ones on earth to struggle with the WHYS? We all go through the five steps of grieving:

Denial & Isolation

Anger

Bargaining

Depression

Acceptance.

Some of us take years to go through the process of grieving and some of us spend some time reflecting on the loved ones life and abilities. If you were there for the loved one then you can reflect on the good deeds you did for this person while the person was alive and you can rest assure that your steps to assist this loved one will be a big part of your grieving process. For instance, if you were there every single day of his/her last days, then this was part of your therapy but you didn't know it at the time. However, as time goes on and you start thinking about it, you will realize that being there for him/her were the best few seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, month or years whatever time it took for this loved one to pass on to a life without pain, without suffering, without anguish, without anxiety and without all that comes with suffering of disease.

What I believe helped me with the grieving process was to arrange and plan her funeral, to spend time with her in the funeral home talking to her and trying to understand the injustice of her death...but I realized that God has a plan for all of us and he definitely planned for her to go on June 6, 1996 though it has been almost 15 years since she has been gone, there isn't a day, month, or year that goes by that I don't think of her. Though our relationship was estranged at times, she will always be my sister and I loved her with all of strength.